Time to shake the rust off (write, write, write)

I've been busy. I'm still busy. I've created excuses for not being able to write. I’ve told myself I am incapable of writing. I’ve grown layers of anxiety, upon excuse, upon self-doubt, upon lack of purpose, upon fearing my own words. In short, I became an onion. I have writer’s onion. It’s similar to writers block but a little smellier. I’m ready to shed off this husk of smelly insecurities.

I’ve been thinking about whether I need to close this blog for good. This doesn’t mean I stop writing it means that this blog would maintain its focus of discussing Japanese culture and I move on to a different blog to maintain and update more frequently. I hope to have my decision by the end of this entry but first let me explain my decision to update.

I woke up today and found out about the death of Ernestine Kimbro, a faculty member at the Evergreen State College. She was the first contract sponsor I had at Evergreen and an influential supporter in my interest in translation and Japanese studies. I think about the teachers that have made an impact in my life and how Ernestine helped and supported my approach to learning through my writing. She emphasized the value to look for the interrelations in the everyday and things that are seemingly dissimilar. No resource was out of reach or too obscure for her. She was an amazing teacher and friend and I like to think the work I did with her was a precursor to this blog.

I had no idea about the breast cancer or the chemotherapy. I guess deep down I knew something was up with the head wraps she wore but I didn’t bother to ask. Hearing the news of her passing away was like waking up from a deep cold sleep.

Returning to those memories with Ernestine two years ago I’ve realized that I have to keep moving. For my own sake and for the sake of Ernestine and what I learned from her I have to keep writing. Writing has meaning; there’s a purpose in doing this. I can’t promise a lot but I can promise to write and reflect on my life when it is necessary. I thought about closing this blog on account of Ernestine but that would be an empty gesture. I want to write stupid goofy things and serious things and be passionate about life and writing again. This blog stays open!

Thank you Ernestine for holding doors open and being an inspiration in my life.

Let me tell you a tale you've already heard

A post! but whats this....

昔々、光がありませんでした。毎日はずっと暗かったです。森や川や山や空も見えませんでした。その時に小川のとなりに小屋がありました。おじいさんと娘はその小屋で住んでいました。おじいさんがわがままでした。宇宙（ゆちゅう）の光がわがままなおじいさんの箱中に入られていました。その同時にワタリガラス(カラス）がいました。いつも、真っ黒から、カラスさんはよく物がドシンと当たりました。暗闇を飛ぶことがすっかりいやになってしまいました。もし、小屋に入って、光を盗んだったら、見えるんだと思いました。その時にいい考えがありました。

ある日、おじいさんの娘は小川に水を取りに行きました。カラスさんは魅惑的な（みわくてき）、狡猾な（こうかつ）カラスでした。女の子は小川で水を飲むあいだにカラスさんは松葉（松針（まつはり））に変身（へんしん）しました。気がつかなくて　　女の子はカラスさんを飲み込んでしまいました。

カラスさんは女の子の中にまた、変化していました。来る日も来る日も女の子のお腹が　大きくなりました。ついに赤ちゃんができました。カラスさんが人間の子供に変身しました！　おじいさんは本当にびくりしました。カラスさんが大きすぎる鼻がいって、ちょっと変な子供なのに　おじいさんが嬉しいでした。毎日、おじいさんは孫（まご）と一緒にあそびました。カラスさんと言う赤ちゃんが箱で遊びたかったです。しかし、おじいさんはそのことを禁止しました。カラスさんが泣き叫びました。カラスさんはめそめそように泣いて、おじいさんが屈服（くっぷく）しました。「さ、その時だけですよ」と言いました。カラスさんは箱を開けて、きれいな光が出て来ました。すぐにカラスさんはカラスにの変形して、嘴（くちばし）で光の玉をひったくって、煙突（えんとつ）から出ました。カラスさんが光の玉を空に投げました。森や川や山や空もきれいに見えます。そして、太陽があったわけです。

The above for those who can't read Japanese or whose computers don't display the characters correctly is a basic translation of the Native American myth of "How the Raven stole the Sun." For those who can read Japanese (and better yet those who also know the myth) feel free to read it and leave your thoughts, criticism, etc.

It isn't meant to be esoteric, I just wanted to show one of the things I've worked on in the past few months. For those who don't know the myth I apologize because I can not find a single decent telling of it as it seems many have been taken down since I last checked. Here is a watered down version. The translation was for some friends, a professor from the college and his wife. The project got me thinking about a lot of things and to reflect on the work I've been doing for the past year or so.

First for the unaware, I have been considering a career in translation for a couple of years. The plan has wavered now and then but I keep telling myself I should be getting myself into this field. The idea is to translate from Japanese to English. That's about as far as I can think out my plan and usually about where I loose confidence in making it a reality and where the wavering part comes in. So my baby step goal for this next quarter is to get a little work experience doing language related work. Coming up in a couple of weeks will be a teacher assistant job, teaching English and correcting papers. Anyways, it will be a launching pad to productivity seeing as I've been feeling like a waste of space recently.

The translation project itself was an interesting experience that reflected a lot of what I've learned in the past about translation but I began to realize it almost immediately. One of the things you'll hear a lot in the world of translation is the idea of a faithful translation, an abstract concept that can be taken as quantifiable . First off, there's no standard for measuring faithfulness. If faithfulness is defined as accurately interpreting the authors words, meanings, etc. wouldn't that require being inside the authors head? Faithful seems to be used to deny and undermine the fact that the final piece is another work in a different language. I'm not saying there's no such thing as a good translation or one that seems to be a dead on interpretation of the original but different languages are not the same. However, this word, faithful cannot be buried so easily as you will soon see...

What made things interesting while translating this myth is that the myth itself comes from oral tradition. Trying to track down an original version of this story is near impossible. Each version I came across varied greatly and not only that they are written versions of the myth. Part of oral tradition is the presentation and how it is told. Its as if I were translating the plot outline of a play, SOMETHING is going to end up missing in the end. So I set about translating a story that has no official text. I remembered back to when I had first heard the myth and piecing together the most important bits from my memory and themes that reoccurred in most of the different versions. Making the language I used simple, I tried to make it as easy to understand as possible sacrificing on voice for correct grammar and well, using Japanese I know. All in all, it felt like I was writing my own work or telling my version of the myth. However giving ones interpretation of the story takes up a huge part of oral story telling, which was not recorded with written language but memorized from story teller to story teller. Pacing, themes, and the story were more important to memorize then words.

So from here I've been thinking about what the relation between oral story telling, interpretation, and translation of text have to do with each other. I hate to use the word but I wonder if its possible to have a faithful retelling of an oral story? Here I have to mention that faithful has become synonymous with good. In common language when someone has translated something you'll here phrases like "I've translated it as faithfully as I could" which to me sounds like "with this impossible task, I've done the best that I could" or "this is MY idea of what faithful means" Anyways, back to the question is it possible? Yeah I guess, just as possible or impossible as it is to translate a novel faithfully. Again I arrive at the problem of the word faithful having several meanings from good to transcribing the word of the lord into x language . There was a time when people believed that there was only one possible right translation for anything.

Its a little abrupt and lack of background information and sources makes me thing I need to dig up some of the work I did last year but I'll stop here. Soon to come are more photos and what I've been up to on this seemingly silent past month.

大阪から宮崎まで From Osaka to Miyazaki (part 1)

If you notice a change in the way I'm titling Blog entries don't worry this blog isn't going to suddenly transform into all Japanese. Any Japanese will obviously have a translation to it and I'll do it to the best of my ability. Speaking of translation I just finished a novel called Kafka on the Shore by Haruki Murakami. Ever since I started last year at Evergreen reading novels translated from the Japanese is like working out some intricate puzzle in reverse. As I read I catch myself trying to picture what the original must have looked like, if anything was purposefully left out or put in. Often times where I am left scratching my head is when some colloquial phrase is used like "Jeez laweez" or the decision to use the term dollars instead of yen when talking about money. The dollar/yen exchange I can easily figure out as well as the reason it may have been preferred for easy understanding but I can't begin to think what "Jeez Laweez" could have originally been. Living in Japan with the names of places, food, etc. fresh in my mind makes the story easy to relate to at times, making the book even better. Last but not least, much respect and thanks go to Philip Gabriel a translator of Haruki Murakami's works.

Depending how I spin it this could be a pretty long story but I'll go at my own pace. The story starts out at school at a time where I'm about ready to pass out from exhaustion and desperately want to get away from classes. Its then when something unexpected happens. Loud speakers audible from anywhere on campus on a Tuesday afternoon politely address the students telling them to leave the campus. Four students have caught the measles and the entire school has to be closed for ten days. Of course I rejoice and can't get off of campus fast enough. However, a quarantine over measles? Just seems strange to me. Up till that day there had been a lot of scare over the はしか　or measles with large posters warning of symptoms. This was all in response to the nation wide "epidemic" that had other universities and schools across the country closing their doors. All of this seemed strange and unnecessary. I mean come on its just the measles. Apparently there was a period of time when vaccination were not mandatory, leaving a predicted 6 million people with out vaccinations.

So with this twist of fate I decided to pack my things and take a vacation to Miyazaki. I made a call, reserved a ferry ticket and headed off to Osaka. On my way there I had a nice lunch with Susan, my Professor in Kobe and killed some time walking around Osaka. Osaka has its share of dirty streets, homeless people, and entertainment districts. I was walking around and decided to drop into a video game arcade which by western standards, are advanced by leaps and bounds. However, there are exceptions to the rule for example this game I found...

The Typing of The Dead! Educational video games just got a little scarier!

type type type! take that you zombies!!! All the standing machines are actually sit down machines with comfy benches. Also notice they provide ash trays at every machine.

I had a good laugh as I played a view rounds of this game mashing the keyboard. One thing that's surprising is even though there is a bevy of new futuristic games coupled with pachinko and slot machines (blurring the line between arcade and casino) a good chunk of the machines are from a decade ago. For example the fighting game Street Fighter II that came out in 1991 is still a staple to the arcade scene in Japan.

With that I traveled on a maze of subway lines to the ferry terminal, got my ticket and past the time in a waiting room with the drone of the news on TV along with old people dressed for adventure and truckers on a regular business trips. I get on the boat and put in a room with wide open floor and cubbie holes with blankets and pillows. Here is where I would be for the next 13 hours. Unlike a bus or plane I had some space to lie down and could get up and walk around if I wanted. I met a nice man who was situated next to me named Sawada. He was traveling to Miyazaki for a school reunion but had made the journey before for business. He lives and works in Osaka and is in and out of retirement, taking up part time jobs when cash is low. He was really nice offering me his number and a place to stay if I ever got into trouble. "Just don't ever ask for money" he said. What made this so funny is he payed for my breakfast and bus fare to get to Miyazaki station without me asking for anything.
Finally I've made it to the paradise that is Miyazaki...

Palm trees included of course

The first step off the ferry had the air sticking to me in the humid climate. The buses, buildings, people were all different and time flowed in a slower relaxed pace. "Slow enough to induce a comatose" as Shaun put it. Here's around the time I find my friend Shaun, fellow Evergreener and exchange student, waiting for me at the station. We take a quick tour of the deserted down town area and head back to the station where we bought tickets from a real person and had them stamped by real people. Passing us by where fields, gardens with flowers, and tiny neighborhoods. We get off at what I think is a station which is actually just a box in the middle of nowhere. We then head for Miyazaki University where I'll be staying for the next five days. Overall it was the first time I had a chance to relax.

(to be continued)